astemode

MEDIA RELEASE

2008-06-07T01:39:00.001+08:00

.hiatus

2008-05-19T13:34:00.002+08:00

19 May 2008
Monday

It’s over
So, over

++++++

Dear readers, I will be gone for a long, long break. Take care and God Bless.

.dilemma

2008-05-16T10:03:00.000+08:00

16 May 2008
Friday

SIGH. Yesterday was pretty much a bad day for me, as well as for ISABEL.

For me, I applied for leave for today, just to prepare for my test this evening. I applied on Monday, and my supervisor approved it yesterday. My colleague, NELSON, was getting all the symptoms of flu and he was coughing all day. So he said he might take MC for today. So, the situation now is that if he takes MC, my section will be closed for the day, meaning that there is no one manning the section. I have always thought each section must be 50% manning or at least one of us must be present. SIGH, I don’t know what happened. I felt so jaded. I didn’t speak much yesterday at work, as I am trying to clear as much work as possible SIGH, I felt bad that I took leave. SIGH! Perhaps, I can’t really satisfy everyone around me. They were talking about me behind my back yesterday, and I couldn’t help thinking that they might think I am selfish.

Since I took leave and now I’m home, I better concentrate on my test and excel on it. Good luck to me.

.puppy

2008-05-12T20:45:00.000+08:00

Aimlessly
It was
Barking
Aimlessly

Its head
Was stuck
Between the fence

I reached over
Trying to save it
Trying to set it free

Life is vulnerable
I was on the verge
Of crying
When I saw it struggling
Struggling to be free
Struggling to let go

++++++

The puppy was stuck in between the fencing of my company today, when I was informed by one of the lift truck drivers. I saw it struggling helplessly. I couldn’t bear just to ignore. I wore my gloves and started to rescue this cute little puppy from strangling to death. I was trying very hard to coax the puppy but it kept barking and wanted to bite me.

After the short while, I couldn’t stand the sight, and I was on the verge of crying. I called back to the laboratory and called YVONNE down to help me with the rescue.

She came down, wondering what was going on. She realized there were two puppies which got stuck. Luckily for the second one, it got itself free alone without any help. She went to look for help and I was trying to get another puppy out. It was a struggle for the puppy. Eventually, one of the technicians nearby came and helped me and set it free.

Finally, I did something I’ve never done in my life – rescuing a dog, as I was afraid of dogs. I basically cannot just let it stuck there and just walk away. It’s unethical to do so. Humans are living things; dogs are, too.

The lift truck driver said I did something good today, by saving the puppy.

I guess I did that without much thought, and just went for it.

OLIVIA NEWTON-JOHN [I HONESTLY LOVE YOU]

2008-05-06T21:43:00.000+08:00

You sent me this song via MSN; now I’m dedicating this song back to you, to show how much I really love you.

[SONG] I Honestly Love You
[ARTISTE] Olivia Newton-John
[ALBUM] If You Love Me, Let Me Know

[PLAYER]

[LYRICS]

Maybe I hang around here
A little more than I should
We both know I got somewhere else to go
But I got something to tell you
That I never thought I would
But I believe you really ought to know

I love you
I honestly love you

You don't have to answer
I see it in your eyes
Maybe it was better left unsaid
This is pure and simple
And you should realize
That it's coming from my heart and not my head

I love you
I honestly love you

I'm not trying to make you feel uncomfortable
I'm not trying to make you anything at all
But this feeling doesn't come along everyday
And you shouldn't blow the chance
When you've got the chance to say

I love you
I honestly love you

If we both were born
In another place and time
This moment might be ending in a kiss
But there you are with yours
And here I am with mine
So I guess we'll just be leaving it at this

I love you
I honestly love you
I honestly love you

.seminar

2008-05-06T20:18:00.000+08:00

06 May 2008
Tuesday

Though today’s a working day for most of us out there, I didn’t really feel that coming. I went to work in the morning and was released from work at 1230hrs for some seminar on ion chromatography, with YVONNE and IJAH. I felt so excited, as I have not been walking around the town area in an afternoon of a weekday ever since I started working. I let go a ‘YEAH!’ when we alighted at Marina Square. We reached there at around 1315hrs and we went straight to the food court for lunch. However the hungry collared executives were queuing for food. In the end I had my worse Korean food ever. The Kimchi soup was so watery and lack of presentation. YUCKS!

To satisfy myself, and the girls, we went to Anderson’s for its ice cream galore. We ordered a total of seven flavors for our galore! We had Fruits of Forest, Belgian Chocolate, Strawberry and Cream, Cookies and Cream, Mocha Almond Chocolate Fudge, Vanilla and Macadamia Nuts. We had a good time eating the ice creams, without really realizing the aftermath [not about whether it was sinful or not]. I paid the ice cream with my newly applied Citibank Citi Clear Card, in order to get a ten percent discount. HAHA!

After such sweet escapade, we went down straight to Suntec Convention and Exhibition Center for our seminar. It started at 1430 hrs till 1630hrs. I almost fell asleep in the seminar room as the sugary effect kicked in [that’s the aftermath I was talking about]. I was hoping the seminar will end any moment. I was basically scribbling notes on my notepad in order to keep myself awake.

After the seminar, I teased YVONNE with the fact that her boyfriend is going to fetch her from there. IJAH and I were so eager to see how her boyfriend looks like. We were like her escort waiting to hand her over safely to her boyfriend. We are so gonna tease her further tomorrow. HAHA!

I bought a Levi’s Signature jeans today. It cost only 49.90SGD. As a matter of fact, I was glued to the print advert they put up in the newspaper recently. I think it is a good deal. I bought the Slim Fit version of their jeans. It is not really tight, but I like the fact that it is not baggy as what I always buy; I’ve a slimmer calves, compared to my whole body contour. I look like JOHHNY BRAVO from Cartoon Network. HAHA!

Alright then, that’s all for today. I am pretty tired. I have no idea why, but I guess I sleep early tonight for tomorrow’s school. God bless everyone out there!

.wives

2008-05-03T22:24:00.000+08:00

03 May 2008
Saturday

Latest update on my collection of wives.

One is missing from the picture. I wonder when she will accept my proposal. I wonder when we can go back to when we were so loving, saying “I Love You” to each other.

SHAYNE WARD [THAT'S MY GOAL]

2008-05-02T23:42:00.000+08:00

[SONG] That’s My Goal
[ARTISTE] Shayne Ward
[ALBUM] Shayne Ward

[PLAYER]

[LYRICS]

You know where I come from
You know my story
You know why I'm standing here
Tonight
Please don't go
Don't be in a hurry
I'm here to make it clear
Make it right

Well I know I've acted foolish
But I promise you no more
I've finally found that something
Worth reaching for

I'm not here to say I'm sorry
I'm not here to lie to you
I'm here to say I'm ready
That I've finally thought it through
I'm not here to let your love go
I'm not giving up oh no
I'm here to win your heart and soul
That's my goal

Please don't go
You know that I need you
I can't breathe without you
Live without you
Be without you
Well I know I've acted foolish
But I promise you no more
No more

I'm not here to say I'm sorry
I'm not here to lie to you
I'm here to say I'm ready
That I've finally thought it through
I'm not here to let your love go
I'm not giving up oh no
I'm here to win your heart and soul
That's my goal

Well I won't stop believing
That we will be leaving together
So when I say I love you
I'll mean it forever and ever
Ever and ever

I'm not here to say I'm sorry
I'm not here to say I'm sorry
I'm not here to lie to you
I'm here to say I'm ready
That I've finally thought it through
(Oh I'm ready)
I'm not here to let your love go
I'm not giving up oh no
I'm here to win your heart and soul
(That's why I'm here babe)
Yes I'm here to win your heart and soul
That's my goal
That's my goal

.long break

2008-05-02T12:25:00.001+08:00

02 May 2008
Friday

Time flies, really. We are approaching to the middle of the year. And soon after, year end. And I grow a year older. HAHA! What am I saying? Am I trying to convey that I’m old? HAHA!

Second day of my four-day break. It was pretty relaxing with nothing in mind. I was trying my best to keep my mind relaxed, but I still need to think about my school. Yeah, I will be having lessons tonight and tomorrow afternoon. ARGGHH! But I’m pretty fine with it, since I’ve not many activities to do lately. Maybe I should start doing revision of the module.

I went for some barbeque session with my cousins yesterday. It was pretty fun seeing most of my closest cousins again. Most of us met at Clementi first to get some food for the BBQ. We took a long bus ride to my aunt’s place for a scrumptious meal. YUMMY! I ate quite a lot actually. But I guess the weight didn’t get much of an increase. HAHA! High metabolism rate? Perhaps, not; I’ve not been exercising lately and I guess it’s time for me to get my ass off the seat and do some sport.

Eventually, I went home with my beloved cousin – YIHUI – and we talked a lot of our problems and stuff. We practically gossiped a lot of things. I still remember the days when we chatted non-stop while I’m tutoring her. AH, the good ol’ days. Now, she’s doing really well in Ngee Ann Polytechnic [YEAH! My alma mater!], and having a good relationship with her boyfriend. I feel so happy for her.

We may have another BBQ session again this coming Vesak Day holidays. I really hope to see them again! Do go, cousins!

.chillout

2008-04-27T20:11:00.000+08:00

27 April 2008
Sunday

Today is my official hiatus from dragonboating. I need time to get used to the life of a working adult and a part time student. No worries, the sport is still my passion; it’s just that I need time to adjust my life a little. How long will the hiatus be? I will never know. Let time tell it all.

Since it’s my hiatus, I practically did nothing today. I spent half an hour walking Causeway Point. Just half an hour. I felt bored, looking at things. I realized I did not need anything at the moment. In the end, I went home.

Just before heading home, I bought my dinner, along with my monthly dosage of Men’s Health. Additionally, I bought 8 Days too. I was pretty glued to the cover with IRONMAN on it. But I just wanted to buy it for the sake of some entertainment news. Nothing much in it. The music section doesn’t appeal to me. The movie reviews are brutal, as usual. [I wondered how much the film companies are paying to the magazine, telling the critics to be lenient. HAHAHA! I wondered will I start a commotion by saying such statement!]

Weekend ended in a simple note, with myself chilling around at home, watching CSI:NY [thanks, ISABEL, for the DVD], reading magazines and SIDNEY SHELDON’s autobiography.

Eh, actually I need a new pair of shoe. I’m looking around for a nice canvas shoe. If I am able to get another adidas sneakers, that will be a bonus! YEAH! SHOES! I just got to wait for Great Singapore Sale, which is coming in the month of May. I am waiting! HAHA! My shopping galore!

SHAYNE WARD [STAND BY ME]

2008-04-27T12:28:00.000+08:00

[SONG] Stand By Me
[ARTISTE] Shayne Ward
[ALBUM] Shayne Ward

[PLAYER]

[LYRICS]

Nothing's impossible
Nothing's unreachable
When I am weary
You make me stronger
This love is beautiful
So unforgettable
I feel no winter cold
When we're together
When we're together

[chorus]
Will you stand by me
Hold on and never let me go
Will you stand by me
With you I know I belong
When the story gets told

When day turns into night
I look into your eyes
I see my future now
All the world and its wonder

This love won’t fade away
And through the hardest days
I'll never question us
You are the reason
My only reason

Will you stand by me
Hold on and never let me go
Will you stand by me
With you I know I belong
When the story gets told

I am blessed
To find what I need
In a world losing hope
You're my only believe
You make things right
Every time after time

Will you stand by me
Hold on and never let me go
Will you stand by me
With you I know I belong
When the story gets told

[repeat chorus]

Stand by me
No more darling I want you by my side
I want you here with me

.first

2008-04-26T23:07:00.000+08:00

26 April 2008
Saturday

After more than a month, I finally got to see my colleague-cum-mum, YI EN, when the QA bunch visited her today. I was thrilled to see her and my brother, RAY, who she gave birth to. He is so cute; I felt like pinching his cheek today, but I couldn’t lay my hands on it as I am scared he may be intimidated.

After that gathering, I rushed to school for my very first lesson in PSB Academy. I felt a dilemma in me was coming – one part of me was hesitant to go to school, and the other was so excited to head school again. Nonetheless, I still follow that the latter part of me wanted. The first module is statistics. I remember I never liked the module when I was in NUS, but now I guess I started to understand the module better. Perhaps I didn’t attend most of the math lectures when I was in NUS. HAHA! I played truancy in university. It is very common, so it is not much of a big deal about it.

I went home after the lecture. However I was caught in a traffic jam. I wondered what is so great about looking at the accident scene when Singaporeans drive through it. They stopped in trying to see where can they helped or they just want to look at the digits on the crashed cars in hoping they might get a fortune from it? ARGGHH!

I am reading SIDNEY SHELDON’s autobiography – The Other Side of Me. I was glued to it after reading the first chapter when he wanted to commit suicide when he was 17 due to the Great Depression; however the plan was dashed when his dad came back in the nick of time. I hasn’t finished the book yet, since I borrowed it yesterday. From what I stopped, his life was pretty much excruciating to live in, with heavy debts and family problems. He worked so much from the age of 17 till 24. Gosh, whenever I stopped reading it, I couldn’t help to reflect about what I am going through right now. If he was able to face so many problems at such a young age, I should be able to do it too.

I’ve never find autobiographies so interesting and motivating. Perhaps I should start borrowing some to read. And of course I will have to choose wisely; don’t expect me to read PARIS HILTON’s. I still remember she couldn’t spell words to be hanged on the billboard in her reality show, The Simple Life. Eventually she posted “SPERM BURGER” on it. It was so bimbotic and hilarious. SPERM BURGER, anyone? HAHA!

JENNIFER HUDSON [I'M CHANGING]

2008-04-25T20:08:00.000+08:00

[SONG] I’m Changing
[ARTISTE] Jennifer Hudson
[ALBUM] Dreamgirls Original Soundtrack

[VIDEO]

[LYRICS]

Look at me, Look at me
I am changing
Trying every way I can
I am changing
I'll be better than I am
I'm trying to find a way to understand
But I need you, I need you
I need a hand
I am changing
Seeing everything so clear
I am changing
I'm gonna start right now, right here
I'm hoping to work it out
And I know that I can
But I need you, I need a hand

All of my life I've been a fool
Who said I can do it on my own
How many good friends have I already lost?
How many dog nights have I know?
Walking down that wrong road
There was nothing I could find
All those years of darkness
Looking for some light
But now I can see

I am changing
Trying every way I can
I am changing
I'll be better than I am
But I need a friend
To help me start all over again
That would be just fine
I know it's gonna work out this time
'Cause this time I am
This time I am
I am changing
I'll get my life together now
I am changing
Yes I know how
I'm gonna start again
I'm gonna leave my past behind
I'll change my life
I'll make a vow and nothing's gonna stop me now

.anotherchance

2008-04-24T19:07:00.000+08:00

24 April 2008
Thursday

I stare outside the window
People walking
People talking
Silence surrounded me
I can’t hear
I can’t shout

Tears
Are building up in me
I don’t know
How long I can hold
The tears

There is only one thing
That is clear in my heart
I really do love you
I’ve let you down
Not only once
But many times
Which I am regretful of

I felt so stupid
I really felt that
I felt lost
I really felt that
I can’t live without you

You gave me chances
You gave me hopes
But
I took them for granted

Will you give me another chance
Will you give me another chance to love you
Will you give me another chance to prove my love
Will you

Please, honey

There is only one thing
That is clear in my heart
I really do love you
I’ve let you down
Not only once
But many times
Which I am regretful of

I know it’s too late now
I know it’s hard for you
I am trying my best to salvage
I am trying my best
My very best

I uphold the promises
I’ve made
For you
For me
I uphold it proudly
I uphold it
Hoping you know my sincerity

Image is ditched
No more adverse effects
I’m no longer
Trying to cover myself

There is only one thing
That is clear in my heart
I really do love you
I’ve let you down
Not only once
But many times
Which I am regretful of

Will you give me another chance
Will you give me another chance to love you
Will you give me another chance to prove my love
Will you

Please
Tell me
What I will need to do
To get you back
In my arms

I will suffer
I will go through pains
I will walk the toughest path
Just wanting you
To get back into my arms

All I wish for now is
You
Just you

Are you worried
Thinking
Whether will I be ridiculous again
Whether you will get hurt by me again
Whether I will give you stress again

There is only one thing
That is clear in my heart
I really do love you
I’ve let you down
Not only once
But many times
Which I am regretful of

Assurance
I will assure you
I am willing to sacrifice everything
In exchange for your love
I won’t be temperamental
Anymore

Will you give me another chance
Will you give me another chance to love you
Will you give me another chance to prove my love
Will you

Please, honey

AKON [SORRY, BLAME IT ON ME]

2008-04-24T19:05:00.000+08:00

[SONG] Sorry, Blame It on Me
[ARTISTE] Akon
[ALBUM] Konvicted

[PLAYER]

[LYRICS]

As life goes on I’m starting to learn more and more about responsibility
I realize everything I do is affecting the people around me
So I want to take this time out to apologize for things I have done
And things that have not occurred yet
And the things they don’t want to take responsibility for

I’m sorry for the times I left you home
I was on the road and you were alone
I’m sorry for the times that I had to go
I’m sorry for the fact that I did not know
That you were sitting home just wishing we
Could go back to when it was just you and me
I’m sorry for the times I would neglect
I’m sorry for the times I disrespect

I’m sorry for the wrong things that I’ve done
I’m sorry I’m not always there for my son
I’m sorry for the fact that I'm not aware
That you can’t sleep at night when I am not there
Because I am in the streets like everyday
Sorry for the things that I did not say
Like how you are the best thing in my world
And how I'm so proud to call you my girl

[Bridge]
I understand that there are some problems
And I am not too blind to know
All the pain you kept inside you
Even though you might not show
If I can apologize for being wrong
Then it’s just a shame on me
I’ll be the reason for your pain and you can put the blame on me

[Chorus]
You can put the blame on me [4x]
Said you can put the blame on me [3x]
You can put the blame on me

Sorry for the things that he put you through
And all the times you didn’t know what to do
Sorry that you had to go and sell those packs
Just trying to stay busy till you heard from Dad
And you would rather be home with all your kids
As one big family with love and bliss
And even though Pops treated us like kings

He got a second wife and you didn’t agree
He got up and left you there all alone
I’m sorry that you had to do it on your own
I’m sorry that I went and added to your grief
I’m sorry that your son was once a thief
I’m sorry that I grew up way too fast
I wish I would’ve listened and not be so bad
I’m sorry your life turned out this way
I’m sorry that the FEDS came and took me away

[Bridge]

[Chorus]

I’m sorry that it took so long to see
They were dead wrong trying to put it on me
I’m sorry that it took so long to speak
But I was on tour with Gwen Stefani
I’m sorry for the hand that she was dealt
For the embarrassment that she felt
Just a little young girl trying to have fun
Her daddy should never let her out that young
I’m sorry for Club Zen getting shut down
I hope they manage better next time around
How was I to know she was underage
In a 21 and older club they say
Why doesn’t anybody wanna take blame
Verizon backed out disgracing my name
I’m just a singer trying to entertain
Because I love my fans I’ll take that blame
Even though the blame’s on you [3x]
I’ll take that blame from you

And you can put that blame on me [2x]
You can put that blame on me
And you can put that blame on me

THE CORRS [ALL THE LOVE IN THE WORLD]

2008-04-23T19:15:00.000+08:00

[SONG] All the Love in the World
[ARTISTE] The Corrs
[ALBUM] Best of The Corrs

[PLAYER]

[LYRICS]

'm not looking for someone to talk to
I've got my friend, I'm more than okay
I've got more than a girl could wish for
I live my dreams but it's not all they say
Still I believe (I'm missing) I'm missing something real
I need someone who really sees me...

(Don't wanna wake...) Don't wanna wake up alone anymore
Still believing you'll walk through my door
All I need is to know it's for sure
Then I'll give... all the love in the world

I've often wondered if love's an illusion
Just to get you through the loneliest days
I can't criticize it
I have no hesitation
My imagination just stole me away
(Still...) Still I believe
(I'm missing) I'm missing something real
I need someone who really sees me...

(Don't wanna wake...) Don't wanna wake up alone anymore
Still believing you'll walk through my door
All I need is to know it's for sure
Then I'll give... all the love in the world

Love's for a lifetime not for a moment
So how could I throw it away
Yeah I'm only human
And nights grow colder
With no-one to love me that way
Yeah I need someone who really sees me...

(Don't wanna wake...) And i won't wake up alone anymore
Still believing you'll walk through my door
You'll reach for me and I'll know it's for sure
Then I'll give all the love in the world
(Don't wanna wake up alone anymore...)

.rebate

2008-04-22T21:04:00.000+08:00

22 April 2008
Tuesday

I went back to school today with my beloved best friend – ISABEL. She was hilarious! She wanted to get the registration of tutorial groups over and done with.

[ISABEL] Can you be a little faster?
[ME] (Thinking) Huh?
[ISABEL] I don’t want to miss my bus ride rebate! HURRY UP!

By then, I was laughing with such hilarious remark she had made. Yah, she can save 0.25 SGD with the bus ride rebate, which has a 45-minute timespan when you transferred from one bus to another. Imagine, for that 0.25 SGD, she’s nagging? HAHA! I wonder how she will look like when she’s a mother. HAHA!

We chatted, and gossiped along our way home. She is interested in joining my company as a lab analyst, as she cannot stand her current job and her supervisor [BEL, I think your supervisor is too weird; quit your job and join me! HAHAHA].

To FOXY LOVE, get well soon, and get ample rest yah? Take care =]

.rejuvenated

2008-04-22T20:51:00.000+08:00

22 April 2008
Tuesday

As the hairstylist cut my hair, I lost my previous identity – someone who still thinks that he is fat, and still lives in the shadow of his past. I ditched my bad boy image of having an ear stud and a tail at the back of my head. I let it go.

I am living in a new world, with more confidence and I hope this boost of confidence can really help me along the way, and can enable me to talk pro-actively.

I can say that I am not fat anymore; though it may seem to be superficial, but I really mean it.

I feel so rejuvenated now. So fresh.

Whatever lies ahead, I have yet to know. I hope it will be enriching. JIA YOU, LEICESTER!

SARA BAREILLES [BETWEEN THE LINES]

2008-04-21T21:05:00.001+08:00

[SONG] Between the Lines
[ARTISTE] Sara Bareilles
[ALBUM] Little Voice

[PLAYER]

[LYRICS]

Time to tell me the truth
To burden your mouth for what you say
No pieces of paper in the way
Cause I can’t continue pretending to choose
The opposite sides on which we fall
The loving you later if at all
No right minds could wrong be this many times

My memory is cruel
I’m queen of attention to details
Defending intentions if he fails
Until now, he told me her name
It sounded familiar in a way
I could have sworn I'd heard him say it ten thousand times
If only I had been listening

Leave unsaid unspoken
Eyes wide shut unopened
You and me
Always between the lines
Between the lines

I thought I thought I was ready to bleed
That we'd move from the shadows on the wall
And stand in the center of it all
Too late two choices to stay or to leave
Mine was so easy to uncover
He'd already left with the other
So I've learned to listen through silence

Leave unsaid unspoken
Eyes wide shut unopened
You and me be
You and me always be

I tell myself all the words he surely meant to say
I'll talk until the conversation doesn't stay on
Wait for me I’m almost ready
When he meant let go

Leave unsaid unspoken
Eyes wide shut unopened
You and me
Always be
You and me
Always between the lines

.search

2008-04-21T10:11:00.000+08:00

21 April 2008
Monday

I went to visit the doctor not long ago. She said I’ve throat infection, causing the right lymph node to swell. I was given Clarithromycin [antibiotic] and Serrazyme [anti-inflammatory]. I hope I can recover well; otherwise, I will have to go under the knife to treat the swelling. I’ve watched a number of medical dramas, so inevitably I will be slightly worried about going for surgery. [Praying!] I really hope I won’t get to go.

After a long conversation with someone I truly love, I felt much better after giving much thought. I am still living in the shadow of my past – being a fat person. He advised me to step out from it; it’s affecting me very badly. I did not know the severity until he told me. I will want to find myself back to the reality, the new me. The New Leicester. Along the process, I am afraid of losing you. I am very afraid of losing you – someone I truly love.

To myself, good luck in search of a better me. I hope You can stay on the side of me. I really do love you. I hope you will be patient.

.200me

2008-04-20T20:35:00.000+08:00

20 April 2008
Sunday

A vow
Which will change
The way I will be
But
I am willing to
Take the unexpected
Path

I have vowed
To be
Understanding
Articulate

I have taken
This vow
Not only for me
It is for you

++++++

The 200th post. 200 posts of emotions. 200 posts of me.

Lately, too many things happened, which I realize I will be better off to be my old self when I was fat, chubby, whatever you guys called it. I guess I was more carefree and happier person. I didn’t lose my temper just like an unprecedented explosion. [Imagine people will shout, “Mt. Leicester has erupted! The Silent Killer!]

That can, of course, be contained. I will have to go for anger management and learn to see things in a bigger picture and be wary of people’s feelings in the process.

I have decided to take a long break during the Labor Day holidays, from May 1st till May 4th, just to reflect on what I can be and what I cannot be. Perhaps through this break, I can find a better self and be happy of who I am and what I have around me. So, people, sorry for what I’ve done lately. And please do bear with me no matter what. I will find myself back.

I’ve got myself another wife – iPod Classic Black. I shall a photo of all my wives soon to post it in my blog. I am planning to save up money to buy another wife – digital camera. Wish me luck in my promiscuous search for my next wife. HAHA!

22 April is Earth Day.

.you

2008-04-13T16:36:00.001+08:00

13 April 2008
Sunday

A mere
Twenty minutes
I ran.

The wind.
It embraced me
Its energy
Relieved my soul

You
It’s you
Who keeps me
On the track.
The path
I’m running

The surroundings
Sped by
It became
Constant lines of
Colors

You
It’s you
Who keeps me
On the track.
The path
I’m running

.notgivin'up

2008-04-12T09:38:00.000+08:00

12 April 2008
Saturday

How can I stay mad with you?
When I’m so in love with you

Oh, oh, oh
I don’t know what we argue about
Oh, oh, oh
When all we do is scream and shout

I still believe in our love right now
And it’s gonna work out some how
You and me, we got common ground
I’m not givin’ up, no

- Lyrics from NATASHA BEDINGFIELD’s “Not Givin’ Up”

.testrun

2008-04-09T21:26:00.000+08:00

Wednesday
09 April 2008

I brought my new running shoe for a test run today. It was very light initially; so as if I was running barefooted. I was running with ease and was cautious not to run onto patches of water or mud. However, Singaporeans are ugly. They don’t give way to joggers.

Anyway, my knees are gradually return to its state, just the right knee needs more time though. I can finally run with much ease. So I hope I can walk and run during Sundown Marathon this coming May.

I am utterly disturbed by this following segment from a Taiwanese programme.

For those who have a hard time understanding, it’s alright. Just that Taiwanese celebrities find that we have a weird accent when speaking English. Com’on! They are no better themselves; at least English is our first language of communication, after our mother tongues. Go reflect, you celebrities!

.193

2008-04-05T15:53:00.000+08:00

05 April 2008
Saturday

That’s the price of my new wife – Crumpler Messenger Bag.

Finally, my number four wife, after my paddle, Creative Zen Stone Plus, and Nintendo DS Lite. Soon enough, probably in May, I will have the fifth one – Apple iPod Classic 80GB. YEAH! but I have someone I truly love – FOXY LOVE.

He always be there when I’m done, making me happy, sad, angry. HAHA! Yah, he commented that I am a temperamental person.

Anyway, I’ve nothing much to blog about lately, just that I had such a bad week in the office. I do not wish to bring it up again.

It’s the weekend; so people, enjoy the weekend!

S.H.E. [TIAN HUI]

2008-04-02T18:52:00.001+08:00

.misinterpretation

2008-04-02T18:39:00.000+08:00

02 April 2008
Wednesday

I am lost
Lost in a world of
Misinterpretation
I am jaded
Jaded in a world of
Misinterpretation

Why is my world
Changed so much
Am I
The cause
Do I
Bear all responsibility

I don’t know myself
Anymore
What is becoming of me
Clueless

.emotions

2008-03-26T20:53:00.000+08:00

26 March 2008
Wednesday

I have no idea whether you guys have heard of the four big emotions of humans [according to a Chinese saying] – Excitement, Anger, Sadness, Happiness.

EXCITEMENT | THE SEVEN PRINCES
Over the weekend, I went to NUSS Guild House at Suntec City for the dragonboat’s first anniversary. It was a blast with the seven princes around [we called ourselves that, because we have seven guys?]. I love them man! We made lots of entertainment throughout the event. The team manager, the captain and the other members were pretty dull. Perhaps, they are always as dull. We poked fun at AD’s nostrils, because SM zoomed into that part when he showed everyone. HAHA!

“Is it on? Is it still on?” That was what GD said when he was trying to know whether SM’s camera is still on. So himbotic! HAHA! So CLASSIC! HAHA!

After the anniversary celebration, we went to Tantric Bar for some drinks to make some of them high; then thereafter to Play for total enjoyment! YEAH! That was the first time I felt so enjoyable in a gay club. I had a little high due to the vodka lime [sorry, my alcoholic tolerate is not that high due to my allergy]. Anyway, we were making fun of AD when most of the princes wanted to strip him. In the end, I was dragged into the strip tease. ARGGHH! Luckily, I’ve GD to cover for me. Thank you very much, GD.

ANGER | STUPID TEAM MANAGEMENT
As for the sub heading, it’s pretty obvious I’m talking about what happened on Sunday. We had a pacing race with CCWA. We did fairly well though we lost to them; but we caught up with them, side by side, most of the time. But ISAAC gave it up while we were rowing, which spurred a big negative moments. Now the entire situation had gone even worse with overpriced paddles and vest. When is that DAVID going to stop his sissified acts? ARGGH!

GD and I were planning to come out with a proposal for formation of new team. The details will be finalized soon. DAVID, you better watch out! HAHA! [EVIL ME!]

SADNESS | POOR WIFE
Or, should I write POOR “WIFE”? HAHA! It’s not exactly my real wife but I still love it. My beloved paddle was damaged over the last weekend. SAD! Part of it was chipped off while I was paddling. I think it kind of scrapped against some barnacles or the boat itself. SAD! I’m purchasing a new paddle anyway. I will still bring her to training, but I will bring the new paddle to competitions.

HAPPINESS | JUST ATTACHED
Yeah, I’m finally attached, after a nearly two months of dating. I asked him when we went Play on Saturday. He found it weird to asked him outside the lavatory area of the club. But I found that was then. I need to ask him whether he is willing to be mine. He said yes. I was so happy. I am happy.

FOXY LOVE, thank you for accepting me. I “heart” you many many. HAHA! That is our lingo. I know you will be reading this; though it may sound very normal to you, but words just can’t describe how I feel about you. Let my feelings show you.

[N.B. some names were given abbreviations to protect the individuals]

.movies

2008-03-18T20:54:00.002+08:00

18 March 2008
Tuesday

[29 February 2008] The Leap Years
[03 March 2008] Bangkok Love Story
[09 March 2008] Meet The Spartans
[17 March 2008] Horton

Though this post is like meaningless to most of the people out there, but it is meaningful to me.

AVRIL LAVIGNE [SLIPPED AWAY]

2008-03-17T15:23:00.001+08:00

Dedicating this song to myself.

++++++

[SONG] Slipped Away [Live at Budokan]
[ARTISTE] Avril Lavigne
[ALBUM] Under My Skin

[VIDEO]

[LYRICS]

miss you
I miss you so bad
I don't forget you
Oh it's so sad
I hope you can hear me
I remember it clearly

The day you slipped away
Was the day I found
It won't be the same

oh oh
na na
na na na na na
I didn't get around to kiss you
Goodbye on the hand
I wish that I could see you again
I know that I can't
oh oh ooo
I hope you can hear me
Cause I remember it clearly

The day you slipped away
Was the day that I found
It won't be the same

oh oh
I've had my wake up
Won't you wake up
I keep asking why
And I can’t take it
It wasn't fake it
It happened you passed by

Now you’re gone
Now you’re gone
There you go
There you go
Somewhere I can't bring you back

Now you’re gone
Now you’re gone
There you go
There you go
Somewhere you're not coming back

The day you slipped away
Was the day that I found
It won't be the same
The day you slipped away
Was the day that I found
It won't be the same

oh oh
na na
na na na na na
I miss you

.cold

2008-03-17T11:13:00.000+08:00

17 March 2008
Monday

I’ve caught a cold. Perhaps, I got it last week, with the drenching moments with the rain and the intensive training yesterday. [*YAWNS]

I actually went down to the doctor’s yesterday night, but I’ve decided to turn it down as there is an existing midnight charge on the 24-hour clinic. The extra charge is 62 SGD. That’s a rip-off! I went down again, to the same clinic, at 0645 hrs. The same receptionist told me to come back at 0815hrs as the doctor has left, waiting for the next one to come. I was so wrong about this 24 hour clinic. TOTALLY. I will never head down again. I went to the next clinic, which opens at 0845hrs. The doctor is so nice to me, telling me to take care of myself. She gave me salbutamol, bromhexine hydrochloride, and a cough syrup [which I think it’s Benadryl].

I feel so tired now; but I can’t go back to sleep. ARGGHH!

I watched The Ellen DeGeneres Show on Channel 5 just now. The episode was about her birthday celebration. I love her! She gave out things to her audience and home viewers [although OPRAH WINFREY did that too]. I almost tear when she gave an all-expense paid trip for this family to go on a 15-day trip to all Disneyland in the world, including the ones in Paris, Tokyo, and Hong Kong. She’s just so good. ELLEN DEGENERES, you ROCK!

And happy 190th post to me! YEAH! 10 more to 200!

.marchthe13th

2008-03-14T00:28:00.000+08:00

14 March 2008
Friday

March the Thirteenth
The day
You
Kissed me
On the cheek

I was
Surprised
Pleasantly surprised

March the Thirteenth
The day
We
Missed each other
For several days

I was
Happy
Pleasantly happy

March the Thirteenth
The day
You
Bought me
Medication for my illness

I was
Touched
Pleasantly touched

[CLOSED DOOR EVENT] ECGSPARKS 1 YEAR CELEBRATION

2008-03-10T21:24:00.000+08:00

.unfair

2008-03-10T18:58:00.001+08:00

10 March 2008
Monday

When on any of the polytechnics’ history that their release of results be broadcasted nationwide? Recently I went to Australian University Health Sciences Open Day. I was utterly disappointed by the fact that A Levels graduates stand a higher chance in gaining admission. Why is that so? Why can’t polytechnic graduates stand a fair chance too?

Even the policies implemented in Singapore restricted the choices polytechnic graduates wanted to have.

bamboo_king from hardwarezone.com.sg posted this:

“My opinion is that we (the poly students) are not respected by the Local Universities, and the JC-kia get better treatment from them. WHY? First, we have less seats given to us even if most students results are good, just that we do not have an A-levels certificate only to prove ourselves. I say we have talents in Poly too, but only the 5% can get in from a talent of about 10% of the cohort's talents. Fair ?? In some occasion, the poly students are better in life-skills and general knowledge than JC-kia. Sometimes even getting good results might not get me a seat in Local Universities. "Someone" needs to give poly students the RESPECT they deserve or else talents are wasted.”

No doubt A Levels graduate cannot get a job readily after they graduate, but that doesn’t mean they cannot find one. No doubt polytechnic graduates can find a job readily after they graduate, but that doesn’t mean they can find one. Nothing can justify that.

I believe that both polytechnic and A Levels graduates should have a FAIR chance [which is 50-50 percent in the placement] in enrolling into universities. Hear me? I said 50-50 percent, not that 15-85, or whatsoever.

.oneweek

2008-03-07T20:43:00.000+08:00

07 March 2008
Friday

It’s been AGES [well, to me] since I’ve last blogged. Sorry guys for not updating. I shall start from Saturday, 01 March 2008.

SATURDAY | GLUTTON’S BAY
I was a little puzzled when SIMEON suggested Glutton’s Bay at Esplanade on that night. We went there and had our enjoyable dinner with FOXY LOVE and WAKKA. We ate something special – Happy Pot. That was the stall’s name. There were two kinds of pots – clay pots and barbecue pots – for us to drool our saliva in. HAHAHA! I was just kidding!

Though the variety of food is pretty limited, I was the first one who surrendered on eating. I was too full then, with enormous consumption of chicken meat [I think it’s chicken breast meat, YUMMY!]. The ambience was good too, with the Singapore’s CBD as the backdrop. I think it is really a nice feeling when you were eating with such a backdrop. WOOTS!

SUNDAY | MANGO NIGHT
After a tough day of training, I met up with FOXY LOVE for desserts. I am not a desserts person, but FOXY LOVE loves eating. So I brought him to Iced Monster, at Plaza Singapura, for desserts. We ordered Mango Shaved Ice and Strawberry and Strawberry Sherbet Shaved Ice. I was very full after that. We went to hunt for nice Crumpler bags after that, but the shops were all closed. In the end, FOXY LOVE ate some hotdog thingy [I couldn’t remember what it was called] at Far East Plaza. We walked back to Plaza Singapura, hoping for a place we could sit down. Eventually, we went to Starbucks The Cathay for some drinks. I ordered Mango Passion Fruit drink, without realizing I consumed too much mango that day, FOXY LOVE ordered Raspberry drink. We parted ways after resting as it was too late to loiter around in this “dying” town.

MONDAY | BKK
I have won tickets to watch the premiere of Bangkok Love Story, a Thai movie. I met up with FOXY LOVE. This movie is rated R21 [Homosexual Content]. Yah, so you guys know what I mean. Anyway, the movie reminded me about the days I’ve stayed in Thailand. And of course my days have no homosexuality activities involved [DON’T think too much]. After the movie, both of us went munching Carl’s Jr. as we were pretty hungry. After that, as usual, shops close pretty early on weekdays. So we went home after that, since I’ve to work the next day too.

TUESDAY – THURSDAY | STRESSED
The workload increased from Tuesday to Thursday as the company is heading to Vietnam for company trip. In fact most of my colleagues are enjoying the trip right now. I had to settle most of the testing before they went for the trip as I couldn’t manage to do it alone. Luckily I have WEE and QIQI to accompany me throughout the absolutely and unusually quiet laboratory. Last I read the record, from Monday till Friday [which is today], we tested 63 compounds. So, we have tested approximately 12 compounds every day. WOW! I was pretty impressed myself. I managed to operate two different HPLC [High Performance Liquid Chromatography] machines.

FRIDAY | RELAX
Finally today’s the weekend. I feel like lazing around my bed for the rest of the weekend. But I do not want that. I will meet FOXY LOVE for dinner on Saturday and dragonboat training on Sunday. YEAH! Hail the Holy Weekends!

.lost&neverfound

2008-03-01T11:29:00.000+08:00

01 March 2008
Saturday

I have no idea who took my POSB Debit card and withdrew 50 SGD at around 0400hrs, at an ATM in my estate, this morning! WTF! Must be one of my siblings. I’ve checked with the bank and they confirmed that someone withdrew money then. I didn’t. I last used my card on 29 February 2008 at MOF. That’s the last transaction I did. ARGGHH! I have lost 50 SGD. There goes my savings. I’ve got to sacrifice part of my usual savings to make up for it. Fortunately, I detected early; otherwise it will be devastated, imagining all your savings gone. GONE!

I’ve decided to change the PIN number of my card so that they will have a big time figuring it out. Why do I have such a fate with such kind of situation? Both my sis and bro denied they have taken the card. But it ain’t important anymore. I’ve realized they can lie. Humans lie. We all lie. It’s a sin, isn’t it?

ARGHH! There goes my hard earned money! ARGGHH!

.leapyear

2008-03-01T02:15:00.000+08:00

01 March 2008
Saturday

Leap year
Once every four years
Is it meant to be meaningful?
Or is it not?

I held your hand
On this day
For the very
First time

++++++

HAPPY LEAP YEAR!

I went to watch the premiere of The Leap Years, produced by MediaCorp Raintree Pictures, and I was simply amazed by the storyline! I love it! The flick is romantic, but VERNETTA LOPEZ kind of like became the spotlight of the movie, with jokes intermittently. FUNNY! YOU GO, GIRL! LOVE YOU!

This movie shows about platonic guy and girl friendship, which I find it very comfy. No words can really describe how I feel about this movie, too much emotions planted down when I watched it. Of course, there ain’t any crying involved for me [but WONG LI LIN did cry in the movie].

I am going to buy DR CATHERINE LIM’s book – Leap of Love – which the movie is based on, and enjoy the literature behind it. I usually have the tendency to read a book when there is a movie based on it, or vice versa. I find it pretty interesting!

ARGHH! What am I saying in this post? I have been losing my writing inspiration; but got a design desire now. What is happening to me? Somehow, I lost it. Somehow and somewhat. HMMMM… It is excruciating to know I’ve lost it.

[SUPPORT] EARTH HOUR 2008

2008-02-28T21:24:00.000+08:00

.familyportrait

2008-02-27T19:04:00.001+08:00

27 February 2008
Wednesday

I really hate my family. TOTALLY.

I’ve been slogging my life out, just to support myself without getting any monetary support from my parents. I know they want their children to have a good life ahead of them. I have tried my very best. I really had.

Since poly days, I’ve been working as a private tutor to pay for my school fees, handphone and internet bills, and my expenditure. I’ve never wanted to get any money from my parents. After graduation, I entered the army, with a reasonable allowance from the army. I got to save a little, just in case I will need it anytime soon. I even forced myself to agree on going to Thailand for a 9-month overseas attachment. It’s been more than five years. Now I am solely supporting myself, with my expenditure and my school fees. Why does my mum keep pressing me to provide monetary support? I don’t earn much. I seriously don’t. All I want to do now is to get a degree. And why is that so much of a problem? Why can’t I take a degree? She is very unhappy with the fact that I am not providing any allowance to the family and taking up a degree. I am paying my own bills and my own school fees. What more do they want from me?

I’m tired. I am really tired. I feel like I’m in the wrong family. I want a happy family. Where is it? I have never felt happy for the past few years. I am tired. I guess it’s time. It’s time for me to leave. I will plan for a departure from this place. I will leave everything behind. For a total disappearance. I will.

I feel like killing myself. Just to end the misery in me.

The painful misery.

.ulcer

2008-02-24T20:54:00.000+08:00

24 February 2008
Sunday

I watched him
Afar
Talking
Happily

Some woes
Struck
My mind

Am I good for him?
Will I take care of him?

I let go
A big
Sigh

A big one
I kept myself
In total
Silence

What should I say?
I don’t know
Love?
I don’t know
Am I able to love him?
I don’t know

++++++

Sorry, my readers, for not updating my blog for quite some time. It has been a busy period, with increased workload and an annoying ulcer forming on my lips. ARGH! It’s been there since Tuesday. ARGH! Fortunately I don’t have any much of exposure to crowds; except when I head town and to training on the weekends. ARGH!

I went out with FOXY LOVE yesterday and we ate Din Tai Fung. It was my very first time there and we ordered pretty a lot. We ate till pretty full. The xiao long bao was good. Eventually I got an ‘orgasm’ with the gravy/soup in the dumplings oozing out.

After dinner, with my ulcer irritating me, it kinda like made me feel very introverted. We went to HMV and I happened to get SHERYL CROW’s Wildflower album, which cost only 9.95 SGD. I bought it because of one song – Always on Your Side.

++++++

I’m sorry
How I wish I can
Grant you everything
You want

How I wish
With all my heart
I can love you
Forever

Will I?

[SUPPORT] YOUTH OLYMPIC GAMES

2008-02-21T19:31:00.000+08:00

[SUPPORT] THE LEAP YEARS

2008-02-20T21:16:00.002+08:00

[MEMORIAM] Lydia Sum

2008-02-19T23:11:00.000+08:00

.inspire

2008-02-18T23:09:00.001+08:00

.vday

2008-02-13T20:46:00.000+08:00

.marriage

2008-02-12T22:16:00.001+08:00

12 February 2008
Tuesday

For no apparent reason, my parents quarreled again. I got to know when my mum was complaining to whoever on the phone.

SIGH! I called this “MAJOR ANNUAL ERUPTION”. It will happen during Lunar New Year period annually. ALWAYS!

I scolded both of them before for quarreling last year. Due to their actions, I have a very bad impression on marriage. I deem marriage as something I most fear of. HORRIBLE!

Then again, sometimes I wondered where my ideal family is. I have no idea. SIGH!

Today is just not my day.

.badday

2008-02-12T20:42:00.000+08:00

12 February 2008
Tuesday

The day started off very nice, with jokes and all. But after lunch, with me working alone in my section today [my colleague went over to another section as they need more manpower], I got pretty busy and disturbed. I think the SDS [Sleep Deprivation Syndrome] was acting up. ARGGHH!

My mood was saddened by the fact that NANNY told me the face shield I’ve worn cannot be washed as a whole; the shield can only be washed, not the padding on the plastic region which holds the shield in place. SIGH! It got me frightened. SIGH!

SIGH! Nothing to write any further.

SUPPORT [EARTHHOUR]

2008-02-10T19:24:00.000+08:00

.lunar

2008-02-09T14:44:00.000+08:00

09 February 2008
Saturday

Actually I have no idea where to start my post, as I am so blur now.

I have been resting for three days already. I felt so weird, having to rest for that long. I have no idea what I am doing for the past three days. Do I know really? HAHAHA! At least I visited my relatives and played mahjong [P.S. I don’t really know how to play]. Boring.

The amount of cash I’ve collected from the red packets will be kept under my fund for me to buy another wife – iPod Classic 80GB – which costs 428SGD. I will get it probably in June. YEAH! End of this month I will get an additional wife – Crumpler Messenger Bag. Hopefully they have black ones! Pray hard!

Anyway, I chatted with DALE not long ago. In our conversation, we have come to a point where we talked about our inspirational songs. He has only one song that inspires him the most. I’ve told him I can come up with a compilation CD! HAHAHAHA! Wanna know the songs that inspire me the most? I will post it as soon as possible.

.greetings

2008-02-06T19:09:00.000+08:00

.theman

2008-02-04T21:26:00.000+08:00

04 February 2008
Monday

Standing there
He was
Jaded

Standing there
On the highway
Waiting for cars

But there wasn’t
Any
Nothing in sight

Standing there
He was
Disappointed

He had
Only one wish
Just hoping for once

He just
Want to go
Home

.weather

2008-02-03T21:48:00.000+08:00

03 February 2008
Sunday

I think I am falling sick. We [the dragonboat team] trained in the rain today. It was an unprecedented situation where we were out there in Kallang Basin and the rain just came pouring down. But it came at the right time. Personally, I felt that the team showed some unity despite the uneasiness from the weather. We rowed so hard in the rain, hoping to reach the pontoon as soon as possible. Good job to my team mates.

Anyway, I spent a lot yesterday on my trip down Marina Square. I bought a pair of PUMA running shoes, a pair of jeans, a jersey from TOPMAN, and a belt from LEVI STRAUSS. All added up to be approximately 170SGD. Hopefully I will look good during Lunar New Year period.

I shall congratulate DALE on his attempt in blogging. And when did I become your guidance and inspiration? I ain’t someone who is able to give those elements to anyone in the world.

ARGGHH! I am really under the weather. KT TUNSTALL [yes, the singer who sang “Black Horse and the Cherry Tree” and DICK LEE doesn’t know who sang it] has a song named “Under The Weather”. I shall post the lyrics on my blog.

[SONG] Under the Weather
[ARTISTE] KT Tunstall
[ALBUM] Eye to the Telescope
[LYRICS]

Under this national rain cloud
I'm getting soaked to the skin
Trying to find my umbrella
But I don't know where to begin

And it's simply irrational weather
Can't even hear myself think
Constantly bailing out water
But still like I'm gonna sink

Coz I'm under the weather
Just like the world
So sorry for being so bold
When I turn out the light
You're out of sight
Although I know that I'm not alone
Feels like home

You say you feel like a natural person
You haven't got nothing to hide
So why do you feel imperfection
Cut like a sword in your side

Coz you're under the weather
Just like the world
And I need somebody to hold
When I turn out the light
You're out of sight
Although I know that I'm not alone
Feels like home

Coz I'm under the weather

.abalone

2008-02-02T00:09:00.000+08:00

02 February 2008
Saturday

I’ve got myself a can of abalone. I was too shocked upon knowing that.

This happened when we [my colleagues and I] were distributing the items in the hampers the suppliers gave it to my department. We used balloting format for this. I was the last few to take the ballot slip. I opened it and saw a big number ‘2’ in it. I was hoping for some chocolates. In the end, [*SIGH!*] I’ve gotten myself a can of abalone. I was in such a shock, because I’ve worked there for not more than three months, and they worked so hard for a year. They should deserve more than me. SIGH!

I met up with my army friends, whom I’ve not met for up to half a year. FINALLY! We went for some Japanese food in Upper Thomson Road. The food remains the same after so long! DELICIOUS! We talked nostalgic stuff. Oh yah! CONGRATULATIONS to Dr. Geoffrey and Michelle on their wedding. I got invited! I must go to see the gang again! YEAH!

I have not updated my music chart. It stopped at week number 9. Got to start it again.

.broken

2008-01-29T21:20:00.001+08:00

29 January 2008
Tuesday

I have just realized I have not many close friends. Is it so hard to find someone I can confide to? Friends. I’m gradually losing faith in friendship. Same goes to relationships. Where does the good go? Why is this happening to me? In my entire life, I have always been full of faith in both elements of humanity. But it seems like it is gone overnight. Just one night. Who did it? I will never know.

++++++

I walked along the road
The lights flickered
Light drizzle of rain
Came down from the cloudy night

Souless
I’m alone
Silence
I’m alone

Aimlessly
I stopped underneath a tree
Looking at
Something

We both left something
There
Something
I will always remember

We both left something
Our vows
That we love each other
Forever

I walked along the road
The lights flickered
Light drizzle of rain
Came down from the cloudy night

Souless
I’m alone
Silence
I’m alone

.vacuumcleaner

2008-01-28T20:31:00.000+08:00

28 January 2008
Monday

Why is my post named as a household appliance? Hmmmm…..

That was what I won during my company’s dinner and dance. WTF! But I was a little sad by the fact that I have an additional vacuum cleaner. ARGGHH! Why can’t I get something more practical? SIGH! Never mind, I am glad that I won something at least. That night was my first time having dinner with my colleagues and my very first time attending a company function [as this is my first major job]. I was seated with my mummy, and ROSEMARY. Almost everyone in the table has their spouse, except myself and ROSEMARY. Eventually I was termed as ROSEMARY’s new boyfriend. I had a lot of fun, seeing the magical performance and granny was the dancing queen! I was so shocked that she, along with all the female colleagues, can dance to the beat so well. For one moment, I thought they were being drunk or something. I was up at the dancefloor initially, but I was back to my seat, conserving my energy for the later part of the night [HEHEHE! Hush for now!]; unfortunately, I was termed LRJ [old man in Chinese] by my mummy because I danced for a while.

After the dinner and draw, I went to Play, meeting a few of my friends. I wasn’t drunk initially, because it was too expensive to buy from the club. I was dancing and stuff. But ultimately, the time is ticking to the 2 a.m. position; I was too tired. I went out of the club with RODNEY and we bought Carlsberg to drink. In the end, we were a little dazed by it. We looked so much like two idiots in the bus stop drinking and making a big fool all of ourselves. I reached home [safely] at around four in the morning.

Five hours later, I woke up, suffering from Sleep Deprivation Syndrome once again. I need to leave for my dragonboat training. ARGGHH! I wore my sunglasses and wanting to sleep in the bus. BUT an uncle was standing so close to me where there was so much space in front of him, making me so uneasy. In the end, I moved away from him. WTF! I was wondering what the hell was he doing! ARGGHHHH! Sunday was the last day where my coach coached us. I was saddened, but I pretended to be strong by smiling. I guess it was good for him to leave this pathetic, unbounded team. Luckily I can still get to see him often around as he was an alumni to one of the universities in Singapore.

That marked my end of another weekend. This coming one will be unknown, as I am not sure whether I am working overtime.

.maxim

2008-01-24T19:51:00.000+08:00

24 January 2008
Thursday

I got into trouble just because of MAXIM Magazine!

This happened in my lab meeting table, with my mummy [who she regards me as her son] and almost all QA colleagues.

[MUMMY] [Pointing at the MAXIM advertisement in MY PAPER] Son, wow! Pretty girl!
[ME] [Glanced at it][Then looked away]
[MUMMY] I think you are gay! Show you pretty girl, no reaction.
[ME] [Started to panic] No!
[MUMMY] Then what magazine you read?
[ME] [Still panicking] Men’s Health.
[NELSON] Yikes! That’s for faggots!

SIGH! I got into such commotion! ARGGHH! I should have said FHM Magazine, which I prefer it to MAXIM. ARGGHH!

Even though I’ve declared, in my blog, that I am a Bisexual, but I still prefer being discreet on that part in reality. ARGGHH!!!!!!

Anyway, the big O result is out today; congrats to RENJIE and YIHUI on their accomplishment! ALL THE BEST for the next step – Polytechnic!

As for me, I received an envelope from PSB Academy, informing me on my matriculation. I finally got into the school after waiting for more than a month after registration. So school, for me, may start in April. I got to read up on inorganic and physical chemistry soon to brush up a little.

TOPTWENTY[WK09] 19 - 25 JANUARY 2008

2008-01-21T21:20:00.000+08:00

.springcleaning

2008-01-19T22:19:00.000+08:00

19 January 2008
Saturday

ARGGHH!!!!! I’ve realized I have tons and tons of stuff, wanted and unwanted. ARGGHHH! I spent half of today just do clear up my study area; coming to realize I’ve a lot of stuff. In the end, I threw away three trash bags of trash. Now, my table is still in a mess; my shelf is still in a mess; the surrounding floor is still in a mess. ARGGHH!

Finally, after nearly three years, I threw my lecture notes from my course in Ngee Ann Poly away. Initially I wouldn’t dare to throw it away, thinking that it might come in handy one day. In the end, I told myself that today’s technology make information readily available online. I let it go. Go to the incineration plant.

I let go of my adidas tag collection. I let it go. I don’t think I will need those anymore.

I am still clearing my area. Still. ARGGHH!

I think I will do it slowly. VERY slowly. At least I managed to convince my day to buy an additional shelf. YEAH!

Tomorrow, I will be doing my annual Lunar New Year shopping with my cousins. I hope I can find a belt that really suits me!

Anyway, ASTEMUSIC TOP TWENTY will be back tomorrow. For all avid chart followers, I apologize for the delay.

Oh yah, in response to my help to name my pet dog, I’ve decided to name her Peanut. YEAH! She is so cute! She makes my day happy every day. How I wish I can have a real pet dog or cat.

.nintendogs

2008-01-14T20:55:00.000+08:00

14 January 2007
Monday

I’ve got one more additional wife [after my Dragonboat Paddle, and my Creative Zen Stone] – Nintendo DS Lite.

Finally! YEAH! I am saving money for my Crumpler and iPod. Good luck to me!

Actually, I am thinking what name I should give it to my dog in my DS. She’s a Beagle – same as Snoopy. Hmmm, should I call her snoopy? That sounds not very creative. SIGH! What name should I give? Someone help me!

I am going to upload pictures whatever I had done over the last weekend.

.deprivation

2008-01-13T21:41:00.000+08:00

13 January 2007
Sunday

I have been deprived of sleep for the past week. I hope I can put it to an end today. I want to start SUPERBLY fresh tomorrow onwards!

Saturday, I went to Sentosa, once again, after so long [last time I went was in like May last year?]. It was refreshing and calming to head there, putting all my troubles behind and enjoy the sun and the breeze. I felt so relaxed after that.

Today, went for my dragonboat training, met up with my best friend and went to my granny’s place for dinner. [*YAWN!*]

I think I will continue writing tomorrow. Good night and sweet dreams.

TOPTWENTY[WK08] 12 - 18 JANUARY 2008

2008-01-12T20:41:00.000+08:00

.siblings

2008-01-06T19:39:00.000+08:00

06 January 2008
Sunday

Sometimes I really wonder why I have such siblings! All took my stuff without permission. My sister will wear my shirt; my twin brother will wear my shorts and shirts; my younger brother will take my money, clothes, shirts and even slippers! WTF! Don’t they have enough clothing themselves? I only have that few stuff and they have to dominate it? I only have a pair of slippers and my brother has to wear mine? ARGGHH! I am deprived of my stuff now! I need to be thinner so that they won’t wear my stuff. Pray to God that he can fulfill my wish!

SERIOUSLY! ARGGHH!

TOPTWENTY[WK7] 05 - 11 JANUARY 2008

2008-01-05T21:24:00.000+08:00

.blueberry

2008-01-05T21:15:00.000+08:00

05 January 2008
Saturday

Anyway, this week was a pretty hectic week. As you know, the start of a new year. My work was like piling as the week went by; it kept on rolling. As of today, I am still clearing my work still! SAD! SAD! SAD! One good thing – I’ve finally worked overtime, which means more money. HOWEVER, part of it still goes to CPF! They deducted a lot man!

ARGGHH! I am so exhausted, after such hectic week; despite it to be a little shorter than usual [Tuesday was New Year’s Day].

I went to watch My Blueberry Nights yesterday, starring JUDE LAW, NORAH JONES and RACHEL WEISZ. The movie was talking about this girl taking the long route instead of the short one to meet up with the man she loves. The entire plot evolved about one message – everyone needs someone to talk to. It is an artistic movie, but it’s pretty good. I like it. It conveys a lot of messages into my mind. I’ve been thinking about it ever since I watched the movie.

Who can I talk to, when I am down?
Will I be a listener when someone needs a listening ear?

[EVENT] Sundown Night Marathon 2008

2008-01-01T12:52:00.000+08:00

For more information, please visit their official website:
http://www.sundownmarathon.com/index.php

.stupid

2007-12-31T20:04:00.000+08:00

31 December 2007
Monday

I have just realized I am a bit stupid. Friends? Who are my friends? Those I’ve met blindly online? Those who I’m throwing affections towards them? God knows. Perhaps I am someone who shouldn’t have any friends afterall.

Utterly stupid.

I am not going to throw my damn affections blindly anymore. Friends? I am legend; be like Will Smith, be alone in the entire universe. Throw away all my contacts and stuff.

STUPID! LEICESTER, YOU ARE STUPID!

.reflection2007

2007-12-31T14:13:00.000+08:00

Look at this photograph
Every time I do it makes me laugh
How did our eyes get so red?

NICKELBACK [Photograph]

++++++

We have reached the end of another year. It’s a long journey for me. Tremendously long. This post is going to be tremendously long, if I managed to write everything down. I will try my best.

FINAL CHARGE!
We always shout that whenever in races. Yes, in dragonboat races. I wasn’t that active in sports in the past. But I was pretty excited when I was pulled into dragonboating. It was tough and taxing; sucking up my happening weekends and got to endure the strenuous part of it. I felt like giving up initially. In the end, I competed in Dragonboat Festival in June/July, SAVA Sprints International in September, and Singapore River Regatta 2007 in November. It is always a learning path for me in terms of rowing and stuff. And I am still learning.

ORD LOH!
This year is pretty significant. After serving the nation full time for two whole years, I am finally back into the life of civilian. I painted the town PINK [indeed pink as my beloved IC is pink in color]. From Basic Military Training to overseas attachment, I learnt pretty a lot from people I’ve met along the way. I am appreciative of what they had done to guide me, pushed me ahead.

PANTHERA
That term was codenamed for my boss’ boss when I was working in Republic Polytechnic while waiting to enter NUS. She was pretty mean to my boss, so I came out with that name, which eventually made my boss laugh like mad whenever I said it. It was fun working there and everyday seemed to be a play-day for me. I played around here and there. BUT! I still do my job alright! HAHAHAHA!

NUS
I went to school, once again. However it was a short one. I withdrew from it, not completing the first semester. It took me long enough to understand the ugliness of having acquaintances and greatness of friendship. I found friends here, and I found weird people here.

FUJIFILM
This is where I am working now. My first job ever since like graduated from polytechnic. I’d never worked in a chemical-related company since then. I was rusty and all; but I am glad most of my colleagues are nice enough to guide me, because I’m the youngest of the entire company! HAHAHA! I am going to work there as long as possible.

STANDARD CHARTERED MARATHON SINGAPORE
I took part in my very first marathon this year, with pretty satisfactory results I achieved. It was hard, having cramps during the run. I told myself I had to do it, for myself; breaking my own limit and prove to everyone I can do it. I did it. I am proud of myself in having done that. I am giving my legs rest in order to run next year. Watch out, people! I am going for the 2008 leg of the run!

THOUGHTS
Why lose so much weight? Just to look good? Or, to have a better health?
I was dumbfounded, when I was thrown with that question recently. I didn’t give a definite answer. SIGH! I don’t know.

Am I happy now?
I am happier when I was fat. Now, I don’t know.

2008
I am giving myself a fresh start in the upcoming year, not looking back in anger. Dumping all my unhappiness behind, bringing happiness along.

I am all set for the resolution I’ve stated for the year ahead. JIA YOU, LEICESTER! JIA YOU, EVERYBODY! Whatever I want to express, it can be found in the meaning of the lyrics posted below. Do read them!

++++++

This is my now
And I am breathing in the moment
As I look around
I can’t believe the love I see
My fears behind me
Gone are the shadows and doubt
That was then
This is my now

JORDIN SPARKS [This is My Now]

++++++

Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten

NATASHA BEDINGFIELD [Unwritten]

++++++

Keep holding on
‘Cause you know we’ll make it through
We’ll make it through
Just stay strong
‘Cause you know I’m here for you
I’m here for you
There’s nothing you could say
Nothing you could do
There’s no other way when it comes to the truth
So keep holding on
‘Cause you know we’ll make it through
We’ll make it through

AVRIL LAVIGNE [Keep Holding On]

.AA&SK

2007-12-30T00:09:00.000+08:00

Sunday
30 December 2007

I had a blast on the very last Saturday of the year 2007. It reminded me to write a reflection entry for my blog. I’ve got to start penning down as 31 December is arriving in the matter of hours.

I went out with SK to Bugis Junction for some shopping spree. I introduced him T-shirt Design Shop graniph located there; I like some of the shirts they are selling. He bought one of the products. It looks cool! We walked around the shopping mall and went to the Esprit shop…

[ME] (Looking their polo tees)
[GIRL] Can you get me another size of the same design?
[ME] Huh?
[GIRL] Oh! You are not the salesperson. Sorry!
[ME] HAHA! Do I look like one?
[GIRL] Sorry!

Hmm, I was wondering how did she manage to think I am the salesperson? HAHA!

Next we were walking towards Suntec City for yet another shopping. Mostly I did window shopping, trying things out. We were so fascinated by an adidas Performance windbreaker jacket; tried it on, but later on we found out it cost 90.70SGD! That was so freaky! Till then I realized I just tried such expensive stuff! We walked out, loved the jacket so much that we kept discussing the jacket ever since. SO NICE!

I bought a pair of flip flops which cost only 7.90SGD which made SK so tempted to buy…

[SK] WAH! You’re making me feel so tempted to buy.
[ME] Huh? Buy then, it’s cheap – 7.90SGD.
[SK] WAH! (Pointing at olive green-colored pair) Will it be AA?
[ME] What’s AA?
[SK] Attract Attention.
[ME] HUH? (Pointing at the pink-colored pair) PLEASE! This pair is more AA LOH!

The cashier, a girl, was laughing at us on the AA part. Eventually I was like AA here and AA there throughout the entire incident. HAHA!

Then we had our dinner at Carl’s Jr. with big-time huge burgers and packs of fries. Nothing much during munching; I was pouring my troubles to him though.

We headed to Marina Square after that and we stepped in Topman.

[ME] (Pointing at a straight jeans) This is nice! Like the denim color.
[SK] this is STRAIGHT jeans, you are not STRAIGHT enough.

That pissed me off man! ARGGHH! He apologized after that. I did something later revengeful [in a good way] back at him. We walked to City Link Mall and I bought Grey’s Anatomy Original Soundtrack Volume 3. I’m collecting it since I have the first two volumes. Nice features of songs in their compilations.

We were at Raffles City Shopping Center and went into Billabong; he got so tempted in buying the checkered shorts. And he really bought it [later he said, he bought it in impulse] for 59.90SGD. I was in total shock! [*GRASP!]

So eventually we walked to Esplanade, as I wanted to see the nice scenery out there….

[SK] I’ve performed here [Esplanade] before.
[ME] Really? Dancing?
[SK] Yah, dancer of Christina Aguilera’s concert.
[ME] Yah, right. Her concert was held in Indoor Stadium.
[SK] HAHAHA!
[The rest of the conversation is going to be censored! HAHAHA! Not for the masses! This was where I got my revenge! HAHAHA! EVIL!]

We sat down outside Esplanade, pouring our thoughts out. I’ve thought a lot. It is going to be in my reflection entry; do read to find out more.

Oh yah, new fragrance on the block. We smelt the naturally defined perfume when we boarded SMRT960, when we were at Suntec City, and when we were heading home on SMRT960 [AGAIN!]! It was so distinct that we cannot really inhale properly! SERIOUSLY, what is going on?

TOPTWENTY[WK6] 29 DECEMBER 2007 - 04 JANUARY 2008

2007-12-29T23:29:00.000+08:00

.sesamestreet

2007-12-28T21:47:00.000+08:00

28 December 2007
Friday

My mum cooked something I can’t eat – eggs and stuff containing beans – for my recuperation of my knees and surrounding ligaments. ARGGH!! Mum, why like that? Anyway, I am curbing my desire of eating eggs and chickens. Luckily I was saved from hunger by a bar of chocolate, given by my mommy at work during Christmas. Mommy, once again, saved the day! [Imagine the Powerpuff Girls scene!]

SERIOUSLY, I have been getting unknown people adding me in MSN and not replying to me when I asked them who the hell they are. WTF!

After much thinking, I am officially pulling away from the current dragonboat team I’m in. I think I am not suitable in this kind of environment any longer. What hidden agenda? Why are those friends of other team mates can join for clinic and mine can’t? Why is HE always be the prime mover of the team? Don’t ever forget he is not coming for ANY of the trainings now. And don’t forget those who pushed this team so hard in the initial stage of forming this team. WHATEVER! I am pulling out from it. I had enough of so much crap ever since our first competition.

Recently, I was browsing through my CD collection and found MICHELLE BRANCH’s third album – Hotel Paper. There is one particular song I love it very much whenever I play that CD. Though it ain’t the official single from her, but it’s clearly my favorite. Enjoy the song. [NOTE: it is NOT the official video or MV for this song.]

[SONG] Tuesday Morning
[ARTISTE] Michelle Branch
[ALBUM] Hotel Paper

[VIDEO]

[LYRICS]
I remember the stormy weather
The way the sky looks when it’s cold
And you were with me
Content with walking
So unaware of the world

Please don’t drive me home tonight
‘Cause I don’t wanna feel alone
Please don’t drive me home tonight
‘Cause I don’t wanna go
Tuesday morning
In the dark
I was finding out
Who you are

I took your picture
While you were sleeping
And then I paved around the room
If I have known then
That these things happen
Would they have happened with you?

Please don’t drive me home tonight
‘Cause I don’t wanna feel alone
Please don’t drive me home tonight
‘Cause I don’t wanna go
Tuesday morning
In the dark
I was finding out
who I was

And if I turned around to see me and I was gone
You should have looked outside your window
‘Cause the sun was coming up

Please don’t drive me home tonight
‘Cause I don’t wanna feel alone
Tuesday morning
In the dark
We were finding out
Who we are
Who we are

.boxingday

2007-12-26T22:15:00.000+08:00

26 December 2007
Wednesday

MERRY CHRISTMAS to the following:
. GERALD
. SAMUEL
. KIAT

[Because I left them out on yesterday’s post. SORRY!]

Anyway, today’s Boxing Day which is also the Third Anniversary of the Tsunami. I don’t know how to describe how I feel. SIGH!

All the best to NELSON for his IPPT tomorrow. He took leave tomorrow, which left me alone in my Section. SAD! I’m praying hard I won’t get more material to test! [*PRAY!]

.christmas

2007-12-25T12:14:00.001+08:00

25 December 2007
Tuesday

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Yesterday, after staying awake for 32 hours since Sunday morning, I missed the Christmas Countdown. HAHAHA!

Anyway, I went to work too. We had a great time yesterday with a Christmas lunch held in the company’s coffee joint. It was heartwarming to receive and give gifts to colleagues who have helped me during this one month [yes! Exactly a month!]. The company offered a big spread of food, with baked mushroom rice with cheese, breaded chicken fillet, sweet and sour fish, vegetables, chocolate swiss roll with icing, turkey, oatmeal prawn, and fruits. I ate a little, because I was not hungry, just tired after the caffeine died down.

Buying Nintendo is right back on track! YEAH! Though I want to get it for my Christmas, but I guess I will have to wait for my next pay! YEAH!

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE:

FUJIFILM HUNT CHEMICALS:
. YI EN [my mommy]
. JUAN LIN [my nanny]
. NELSON [my teacher]
. YVONNE
. SOCK HUI
. IJAH
. UNCLE WEE
. DORIS [my granny]
. DANIEL
. SHAIK
. YIN KWAN
. ROSEMARY

FRIENDS:
. ISABEL
. LALITHA
. MEDHA
. DAREN NG KOK CHIN
. JUN WEI
. XIAO YAN
. DARREN
. JERALD
. BENJAMIN CHOW

ARMY:
. JEFF
. GARY
. WENDY
. QUNGEN
. KUN XIANG
. YONG QIANG
. LONG
. DESMOND
. DAVID
. SAMUEL
. SUPERMAN
. JIA HAO
. RICHIE
. PRADIP
. BENJAMIN KWEK
. CHUN XI
. WEIDA
. SGT JOHN
. SGT JOEY
. JUN WEI
. WEN QIANG
. KAREN
. RAJAN
. DR CHOO
. DR BEN

COUSINS:
. QI
. JACKY
. YIHUI
. AH JIE
. REN JIE

ECGSPARKS:
. SHERMAN
. SIMEON
. BERNICE [where are you! I miss you!]
. CAREY
. JUN YI
. DIANA
. MOSES
. TAIKEE
. GOI

… And many more friends [sorry if I didn’t write your names down. Do inform me alright?]

To end this post, I uploaded one of my favorite Christmas songs of all time. [Pardon me for the bad quality of the video] MERRY CHRISTMAS once again!

[SONG] Do they know it’s Christmas [Feed the World]
[ARTISTE] Band Aid 20
[ALBUM] Singles

[VIDEO]

[LYRICS]

It's Christmastime; there's no need to be afraid
At Christmastime, we let in light and we banish shade
And in our world of plenty we can spread a smile of joy
Throw your arms around the world at Christmastime
But say a prayer to pray for the other ones
At Christmastime

It's hard, but when you're having fun
There's a world outside your window
And it's a world of dread and fear
Where the only water flowing is the bitter sting of tears

And the Christmas bells that ring there
Are the clanging chimes of doom
Well tonight thank God it's them instead of you
And there won't be snow in Africa this Christmastime

The greatest gift they'll get this year is life
Oh, where nothing ever grows, no rain or rivers flow
Do they know it's Christmastime at all?

Here's to you, raise a glass for everyone
Here's to them, underneath that burning sun
Do they know it's Christmastime at all?

Feed the world
Feed the world

Feed the world
Let them know it's Christmastime again
Feed the world
Let them know it's Christmastime again

.nintendo!

2007-12-23T22:18:00.000+08:00

23 December 2007
Sunday

ARGGHH! I wanna kill myself already! WHERE ARE YOU, NINTENDO DS LITE? WHERE ARE YOU, R4?

The R4 cannot be found! SIGH! There goes my wish to have a Nintendo DS Lite. [*CRYING!]

I hope it will come back. I seriously hope so!

I shall update more tomorrow. Take care!

ATHLETE [WIRES]

2007-12-23T11:58:00.000+08:00

[SONG] Wires
[ARTISTE] Athlete
[ALBUM] Tourist

[VIDEO]

[LYRICS]

You got wires, going in
You got wires, coming out of your skin
You got tears, making tracks
I got tears, that are scared of the facts

Running, down corridors through, automatic doors
Got to get to you, got to see this through
I see hope is here, in a plastic box
I've seen christmas lights, reflect in your eyes

You got wires, going in
You got wires, coming out of your skin
There's dry blood, on your wrist
Your dry blood on my fingertip

Running, down corridoors through, automatic doors
Got to get to you, got to see this through
First night of your life, curled up on your own
Looking at you now, you would never know

I see it in your eyes, I see it in your eyes
You'll be alright
I see it in your eyes, I see it in your eyes
You'll be alright

Alright

Running, down corridors through, automatic doors
Got to get to you, got to see this through
I see hope is here, in a plastic box
I've seen christmas lights, reflect in your eyes
down corridors, through automatic doors
Got to get to you, got to see this through
First night of your life, curled up on your own
Looking at you now, you would never know.

SIMPLE PLAN [PERFECT]

2007-12-22T17:29:00.001+08:00

[SONG] Perfect
[ARTISTE] Simple Plan
[ALBUM] No Pads, No Helmets... Just Balls

[VIDEO]

[LYRICS]

Hey dad look at me
Think back and talk to me
Did I grow up according to plan?
And do you think I'm wasting my time doing things I wanna do?
But it hurts when you disapprove all along

And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
I can't pretend that
I'm alright
And you can't change me

'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

I try not to think
About the pain I feel inside
Did you know you used to be my hero?
All the days you spent with me
Now seem so far away
And it feels like you don't care anymore

And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
I can't stand another fight
And nothing's alright

'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

Nothing's gonna change the things that you said
Nothing's gonna make this right again
Please don't turn your back
I can't believe it's hard
Just to talk to you
But you don't understand

'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

.support

2007-12-22T16:15:00.000+08:00

TOPTWENTY[WK5] 22 - 28 DECEMBER 2007

2007-12-21T22:40:00.000+08:00

[GRAMMYS]nominations

2007-12-21T20:28:00.000+08:00

.wish

2007-12-20T23:35:00.001+08:00

20 December 2007
Thursday

The sky was finally clear
After a big rain

I sat down
Beside the window
Of a crowded café
Alone

I couldn’t
Hear anything
That were surrounding me

I couldn’t
See anyone
That were surrounding me

I stared at the window
Slight drizzle
With raindrops

Raindrops
Are too big to cling onto
The window pane
They slid down
Like shooting stars
Not bright
Yet so nice

Will they grant wishes?
I just need a wish

I just want to be happy
But I am not good
For this world
For people around me

I sat down
At a crowded café
Alone
Staring at
Raindrops

.leicester

2007-12-19T20:30:00.001+08:00

19 December 2007
Wednesday

Leicester
Who is he?

He
Is not the same person
Who you know

He
Might have changed
He
Is confused by that

Has he changed?
He wondered

He is no longer good enough
For that someone
That someone
Is nice and all

But
Leicester
Is no longer good enough

No longer good enough

.shopping

2007-12-16T21:53:00.000+08:00

16 December 2007
Sunday

I went to Marina Square with ISABEL [AGAIN; like we went out last Saturday!]. I spent 142.57SGD on the following items:

. adidas clima365 singlet
. reebok singlet
. MOF lunch
. G2000 shorts
. G2000 dobby shirt
. Giordano linen skater shorts
. adidas shoe bag

Yeah! It’s SALE season amidst of Christmas season.

ISABEL wanted to go FOX; so we went. I saw this shirt in brown. [*DAMN NICE!] Unfortunately, it was too expensive for me to grab hold of it. BUT! I wore it in the changing room. HAHAHAHA!

Epilepsy Care Group had their Christmas dinner party with “Back to School” theme yesterday. It was fun; I was like a cam whore! WAHAHA! I hope I can upload my pictures soon, with me wearing ACS uniform. It was good!

TOPTWENTY[WK4] 15 - 21 DECEMBER 2007

2007-12-14T23:22:00.001+08:00

.short

2007-12-11T20:29:00.000+08:00

11 December 2007
Tuesday

Sun came out for a while today. That’s about it for Sun. Where are you, Sun? Sigh, it’s been ambushed by Rain for the past few days and I couldn’t take it any longer. I need Sun back!

Anyway, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO DADDY! I gave him a kit consisting of shaving gel, facial foam and sun spray; all from Nivea. He likes it and commented that he won’t use it. HAHA!

As I am too exhausted to update on weekdays, the post seems a little short. SIGH!

.miscalculations

2007-12-08T23:08:00.000+08:00

08 December 2007
Saturday

It was a day of miscalculations. I met up with ISABEL after my application of private degree in PSB Academy. I met her at GAP CentrePoint, where she bought some clothes [I have no idea the terms, but it looks great!]. The best part? One of the clothes was quoted for 30 percent discount. In the end, she got like 55.89% discount. One error! She got that offer! OH MY GOD! I wondered whether other shoppers get the same discount.

After that, we went to Ichiban Sushi at the basement of the same shopping center. We ate a total of 15 plates of sushi on the conveyor belt and I ordered their Super Madness Set, consisting of one bowl of black pepper salmon with rice, Japanese fried dumplings, and a Miso soup. But when billing, ISABEL realized the cashier forgot to input my Super Madness Set. For that moment I was whispering to her, but got stopped by her poke. I wondered why in that moment, until when we were out from the restaurant. She told me that my set wasn’t considered in the bill. I was laughing my way out because it seemed such a day of miscalculation whenever she used her credit cards. HAHAHA!

Then our time got cut by the arrival of her boyfriend. The entire scene was a little awkward when he arrived, because I have absolutely no idea what to talk to him. I hope I am able to converse with him soon.

I went to Bukit Panjang Plaza to purchase hair wax and borrowed a book. I hope it’s real nice for me to continue reading. HAHA! I reached home at around six in the evening; started watching latest episodes of Private Practice, Ugly Betty, and Grey’s Anatomy.

Tomorrow will be a boring day for me – tidying up my study area. Or should I say, Chilling Area? Hmmm… Oh yah, I’ve updated my wish list for the next year ahead. Hopefully I can grab hold of the items soon. [*Praying HARD!]

Oh yah! I hope you guys scroll down to the Campaign I’m hosting – Give CD. It’s an environmental drive. I hope you guys don’t throw them away; instead, give it to me. I really want to keep them and build a library, with your help. THANK YOU VERY MUCH! [I’ve made a mistake in the earlier poster. It’s “an environmental drive by” instead of “a environmental drive by”. SHIT! But I’ve made that change. HAHA!]

TOPTWENTY[WK3] 08 - 14 DECEMBER 2007

2007-12-07T23:14:00.000+08:00

.campaign

2007-12-06T21:36:00.000+08:00

.results

2007-12-04T20:54:00.000+08:00

04 December 2007
Tuesday

The marathon results are out, for individual record. Here is mine.

The timings are:
5hr50min38sec [gun]
5hr45min24sec [net]

It’s my personal achievement; never thought I can complete the marathon! Standard Chartered Singapore Marathon 2008, here I come!

.sacrificialLEGS

2007-12-03T09:52:00.000+08:00

03 December 2007
Monday

Yesterday was my day of using my legs the most. In the morning, I’d participated my first 42.195km marathon. I managed to complete it despite having muscle cramps intermittently after running 24km non-stop. The rest of the journey was painful and hard; at that moment I felt like giving up, but I didn’t. I told myself I am going to finish the race no matter what. It took me 5hrs 50mins to complete the race – my personal best! I’ve got a medal and a finisher tee shirt for this race. I couldn’t walk properly for the rest of the day.

However, I met up with QUNGEN, YONG QIANG, KUN XIANG and a few of my unit mates, and DARREN, for Action for AIDS’ Walk to Stop AIDS. LUCKILY, the walk was short from Skate Park to C.K. Tangs. Otherwise, my legs will not take it man! HAHAHA! We got a goodie bag containing NewUrbanMale Singlet, VERVE sunglasses, LOVEBOX condoms [yes, condoms], and a SAFE SEX collar pin [will you wear? Hmmm…]. It was cool seeing everyone there and guess what DARREN did? HAHAHA!

After the walk, I had dinner with DARREN at The Soup Spoon. Soon after that I went Bukit Panjang Plaza to visit my company’s appointed doctor to get something to soothe my legs. He prescribed me painkillers and methyl salicylate cream. He also gave me one day MC for Monday. YEAH! I can rest for one day!

Once I’ve reached home, I tried the sunglasses…

TOPTWENTY[WK2] 01 - 07 DECEMBER 2007

2007-12-01T15:12:00.000+08:00

.memoriam

2007-11-27T21:42:00.001+08:00

.birthday&work

2007-11-26T19:01:00.000+08:00

26 November 2007
Monday

I wanted to update my blog yesterday, but I was too tired to go online and type.

I want to thank the following friends/cousins who sent me best wishes on my birthday:
. JACKY
. ISABEL [Thank you for the gift! I LOVE IT!]
. FREDDY
. JUNWEI
. DARREN
. ZHAN HONG
. OCTAVIOUS
. MEITIN
. XIAO YAN
. MCGEORGIE

Those who sang birthday song to me:
. SIMEON
. ADRIAN
. KS
. SHERMAN
. DIANA
. LALITHA [Thank you for singing the song on a long-distance call!]

THANK YOU, guys!

I went for training as usual yesterday [no exception for the Birthday Boy]. And SIMEON was like telling everyone that it was my birthday. And they sang birthday song right in the middle of our training, when we were under Nicoll Highway. HAHAHA! I was blushing! But really thank them for such special lineup.

Then after training I went to City Hall to meet up with my best friend, ISABEL. She gave me a big present – a set of products from The Body Shop and a Memo set from Esprit. THANK YOU! We went for Sakae Sushi as our meal. I ate quite a lot that I have no strength in walking after that! HAHA!

We went to Suntec City after that and I went to collect my Standard Chartered Marathon race pack and there’s this male volunteer came standing beside and patted on my shoulder, telling me that he was DARED to talk to me. I was like, “HUH?” He said he was being challenged by a group of girls. WTF!

Then we went shopping for a while before heading home. I was too tired to stay awake. In the end I slept after I ironed my clothes for my new job.

++++++

I went to work today. It was pretty interesting and fun. The people there are nice! First day, there ain’t much stuff for me; just some briefing and the practical of certain lab equipment. Hopefully I can perform well for my job! JIA YOU!

.cowboy

2007-11-24T15:02:00.000+08:00

24 November 2007
Saturday

I had McDonald’s earlier today, with two of my aunts. Something happened.

This is the STANDARD order I’d made:
1 set of 6-piece Chicken McNuggets Extra Value Meal
1 set of Grilled Chicken Foldover Extra Value Meal
2 orders of Filet-O-Fish burger

Interpretation: From this order, there will be a total of two drinks, two packets of fries, two Filet-O-Fish, one Chicken Foldover and one pack of McNuggets.

In the end, I had two drinks, two Filet-O-Fish, one Chicken Foldover, one pack of McNuggets and THREE packets of fries! It was so damn COOL! We couldn’t finish the fries, even with my father around.

Anyway, I had a long talk with my dad, regarding my future education prospect. I told him about my perspective on my career path, which is to work in the medical field. Yah, I want to be a nurse, paramedic or anything related with medicine. He totally understands. I am so glad he did. Hopefully my relatives won’t bug me on my case of withdrawal from NUS. [*Praying HARD!]

Anyway, while having the meal…

[AUNT 1] All my children [which are my cousins] sleep in all the rooms in the household.
[AUNT 2] Then, how about you and your husband?
[AUNT 1] Usually I will sleep with my daughter, and he will sleep in the living room. But we can sleep in one of the rooms when one of our sons booked into the camp.
[AUNT 2] Oh, then how you guys…..?
[AUNT 1] Oh, u mean “5 Times”?
[ME] What’s “5 Times”?
[AUNT 1] That’s my codename with my husband, if we want to….
[ME] Why “5 Times”? [by this time, I was giggling like mad!]
[AUNT 1] Don’t know. HAHA
[AUNT 1] We have another codename: COWBOY.

By that, I was laughing like MAD! TOTALLY! HAHA! I can’t imagine when I tell my cousins about this! HAHA!

.matching

2007-11-23T20:53:00.000+08:00

23 November 2007
Friday

SIGH! I went to Guardian Bukit Panjang Plaza today in search for the adidas deodorant and shower foam set; but there ain’t any! Why? WHy? WHY?

Never mind, in the end, I bought myself a new webcam from Creative. It’s black in color, which is matching with my black laptop. [eh, this sentence reminded me of MOCCA’s “looking at the matching pipes.”][SHRUGS!]

Oh, my music chart has upgraded! Instead of ten hits, now it’s 20 hits! Cool! I think there are more songs to keep it on my chart, so I upgraded! So, bear with me, this week’s chart will be back to week 1 and whatever reflected on the previous TOPTEN will not be utilized in this TOPTWENTY chart. Now, it is based on my FOUR main charts – Power 98FM Red Hot 30, Billboard Hot 100, Top of the Pops Singles, and Global Track Chart – instead of the previous FIVE [Yes, 987FM Top 20 is out].

Yawn, I haven’t gotten my race pack yet. I might head down tomorrow or the day after. TIRED! And it’s a waste of money. I think I will go there after my Sunday’s training. YEAH!

To all my friends who are currently mugging for papers, ALL THE BEST and JIA YOU!

Oh yah, I managed to grab hold of the latest MTV of AVRIL LAVIGNE’s new single, Hot. Enjoy.

[SONG] Hot
[ARTISTE] Avril Lavigne
[ALBUM] The Best Damn Thing

[VIDEO]

[LYRICS]
You're so good to me Baby Baby

I want to lock you up in my closet, when no one's around
I want to put your hand in my pocket, because you're allowed
I want to drive you into the corner, and kiss you without a sound
I want to stay this way forever, I'll say it loud
Now you're in and you can't get out

You make me so hot
Make me wanna drop
You're so ridiculous
I can barely stop
I can hardly breathe
You make me wanna scream
You're so fabulous
You're so good to me Baby Baby
You're so good to me Baby Baby

I can make you feel all better, just take it in
And I can show you all the places, you've never been
And I can make you say everything, that you never said
And I will let you do anything, again and again
Now you're in and you can't get out

You make me so hot
Make me wanna drop
You're so ridiculous
I can barely stop
I can hardly breathe
You make me wanna scream
You're so fabulous
You're so good to me Baby Baby
You're so good to me Baby Baby

Kiss me gently
Always I know
Hold me love me
Don't ever go
Ya

You make me so hot
Make me wanna drop
You're so ridiculous
I can barely stop
I can hardly breathe
You make me wanna scream
You're so fabulous
You're so good to me

You make me so hot
Make me wanna drop
You're so ridiculous
I can barely stop
I can hardly breathe
You make me wanna scream
You're so fabulous
You're so good to me Baby Baby
You're so good to me Baby Baby
You're so good

TOPTWENTY[WK1]23-29 NOVEMBER 2007

2007-11-22T21:46:00.001+08:00

.low

2007-11-22T17:51:00.000+08:00

22 November 2007
Thursday

SIGH! Where are my avid readers? Yesterday, the number of visitor dipped to an all-time low, 8 visits. SIGH!

In less than two weeks’ time, I will be running the Standard Chartered Marathon and walking the AIDS Walk. YEAH! Oh yah, I will be heading to Suntec City tomorrow to collect my entry pack. WOW! I can’t wait for the adidas stuff! YEAH!

Three more days to my birthday; and I have training on that day. I hope they won’t sabotage me that day. Otherwise, I will die! HAHA! I’ve bought myself a new Nalgene bottle. It’s larger in capacity than my previous one. YEAH! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME! I will be buying adidas deodorant and shower foam set from Guardian tomorrow! Why? Hmm, because they give free adidas toiletries bag! HAHAHA! I like the design! WOW! YEAH! [*oops! Sorry!]

I will upload the brand new ASTEMUSIC TOPTEN chart later! A note to 987FM: PLEASE update your acclaimed “Singapore’s Official Chart”! I will follow what Donald Trump – “YOU’RE FIRED!”

.hired

2007-11-20T17:12:00.000+08:00

20 November 2007
Tuesday

YEAH! I am employed by FUJIFILM as their laboratory technician! HOORAY! I am heading back to the office to get some administrative stuff done tomorrow! I am so excited to work! At least I won’t have to slack my life out for the next few months.

Yah, referring to yesterday’s poster, PEOPLE! Please support the Walk! Decrease the prevalence rate of AIDS! Do Support!

Actually I have nothing much to update recently, because I am not studying anymore. SIGH. But like I said earlier, I am going to take up a private degree. YEAH! Not going to give up on studies!

.AIDSwalk

2007-11-19T16:21:00.000+08:00

.sunday

2007-11-18T19:45:00.001+08:00

18 November 2007
Sunday

Seven days
One week
Will I be celebrating it alone?

Candle light
Shone on my face
Alone

No birthday song
No clapping
No well wishes

Seven days
One week
Will I be celebrating it alone?

++++++

Wow, today’s weather was a disaster; early half of the day, scorching hot; later half, windy cool.

I went for training today. It was cool with the individual coaching again. I had learnt new stuff today by minimizing my excessive usage of my back to perform the same stroke the coach wants! YEAH! DIANA brought her camera onboard the boat and filmed us on training. It was pretty cool! I will post it on YouTube, but will be privatized [only for the team members to view].

After training, a whole lot of us went to Kenny Rogers Suntec for their food. I ordered their Chicken Pot Pie. It wasn’t that nice, due to the fact that the chicken was cooked like herbal chicken. NOT NICE!! We went to the reserved area for our meal. It was a blast of fun; with the Master and Slave topic floating around [I shan’t elaborate more :P].

I felt so tired. SIGH. I am going for another job interview tomorrow. Hopefully the pay is reasonable.

I shall post a nice song today too. Enjoy.

[SONG] Same Mistake
[ARTISTE] James Blunt
[ALBUM] All the Lost Souls

[VIDEO]

[LYRICS]
Saw the world turning in my sheets
And once again, I cannot sleep
Walk out the door and up the street
Look at the stars beneath my feet
Remember rights that I did wrong
So here I go

Hello, hello

There is no place I cannot go
My mind is muddy but
My heart is heavy, does it show
I lose the track that loses me
So here I go

oo oooooo ooo ooo oo oooo...

And so I sent some men to fight,
And one came back at dead of night,
said HE'D seen my enemy?"
said "he looked just like me"
So I set out to cut myself
And here I go

oo oooooo ooo ooo oo oooo...

I'm not calling for a second chance,
I'm screaming at the top of my voice,
Give me reason, but don't give me choice,
Cos I'll just make the same mistake again,

oo oooooo ooo ooo oo oooo...

And maybe someday we will meet
And maybe talk and not just speak
Don't buy the promises 'cause
There are no promises I keep,
and my reflection troubles me
so here I go

oo oooooo ooo ooo oo oooo...

I'm not calling for a second chance,
I'm screaming at the top of my voice,
Give me reason, but don't give me choice,
Cos I'll just make the same mistake (REPEAT) again

oo oooooo ooo ooo oo oooo...

So while I'm turning in my sheets

And once again, I cannot sleep

Walk out the door and up the street

Look at the stars

Look at the stars, falling down,

And I wonder where, did I go wrong.

.message

2007-11-17T22:14:00.001+08:00

the click five [empty]

2007-11-17T19:29:00.000+08:00

[SONG] Empty
[ARTISTE] The Click Five
[ALBUM] Modern Minds and Pastimes

[VIDEO]

[LYRICS]
Tried to take a picture of love
Didn't think I'd miss her that much
I wanna fill this new frame
But it's empty

Tried to write a letter in ink
It's been getting better I think
I got a piece of paper
But it's empty It's empty

Maybe we're trying, trying too hard
Maybe we're torn apart
Maybe the timing is
beating our hearts
We're empty

And I even wonder if we
Should be getting under these sheets
We could lie in this bed
But it's empty
It's empty

Maybe we're trying, trying too hard
Maybe we're torn apart
Maybe the timing is
beating our hearts
We're empty

Maybe we're trying, trying too hard
Maybe we're torn apart
Maybe the timing is
beating our hearts
We're empty
We're empty
We're empty